Creative Writing

            Okay, so awhile back I was assigned the task of making a children's book for Creative Writing. I still have to get it done... And I'm thoroughly stuck. Thing is, it has to have some sort of moral or lesson. And let me tell you, I can't think of crap.
            So it's about Stormy, Frizz, and Miv. That's all I've got. Well, that and two pages. A start. And now I've just sort of gone 'Fuck, what now?' And come to think of it, not all children's books have morals do they? What's the moral of Cat and the Hat? Don't let stray cats into your house ever, probably. Having wild parties when your parents are gone is okay as long as you get rid of all the evidence, maybe. Oh, and something ticked me off when they first assigned it and the teacher showed us a video on making these things in case we couldn't possibly fathom how to write for children. (It's not really rocket science, is it? People read books when they were kids they know what those are like.) 
"To make your book the most appealing to both genders..."
Okay... make it about an animal?
"...make your main character a boy."
I'm sorry, what?
That's the most backwards malarkey I've ever heard
            Okay, so speaking of stories, you remember that boredom-fueled story I mention a billion years ago? No? Well I may be posting it soon. Here's a preview:

                It stared up at me as I raised my weapon. It was deadly, its soulless eyes glistened with false tears and I… I couldn’t do it. About five of them latched onto me at once, and I could feel them sucking the life out of me almost instantly. I felt myself losing consciousness… losing myself.

*             *             *

How pathetic. They were the size of hamsters. They were pure evil! But they were dang cute. The personification of boredom itself. It just had to touch you to drain you mind and body. It doesn’t let go until there’s nothing left. When they finish, you’d have died of boredom. I had discovered them accidentally, at my sister’s school, and found them nesting in the walls upon our closer inspection. Nobody had actually died yet, but they had spread as far as into the hospital itself. I had learned to hate them with a vengeance, but still couldn’t lay a finger on them.

Looks like that finally came around to bite me. Literally.

            So this will be up on Wattpad as soon as I get this damn thing posted after three goes. I don't care anymore, I doing this thing! I'm making this happen!

T.Y.G.E.R.

I'm Baa-aack!

            Okay, so it's been a long time. A really, really, really long time. I have been preoccupied. For one, I have school. School is something I do not enjoy. I do not look forward to any of the classes I currently have. I have effing year-long math. Anyway, some stuff I have been doing, in convenient list form.

1. I have lopped most of my hair off because long hair is a pain in the everything.
2. I started reading Homestuck. I have caught up and am now playing the waiting game 'til the Gigapause ends.
3. Trying to make a Jade Harley Godteir costume. I discovered cosplay is absurdly expensive.
4. Started an Homestucky RP thing with my friend. It's currently on hiatus.
5. Nearly filled up my drawing journal.
6. Worrying about my sanity due to a recent dream I had...
7. Banging my head on a keyboard instead of writing anything substantial.
8. Resisting the urge to start new story after new story when I have yet to finish ANY of my other ones.
9. Trying to convince myself that my other stories actually don't suck and to keep trying to finish them instead of 'revamping' them into something 'better.'
10. Gradually descending into a 'Don't Talk To Me, I Don't Care' attitude toward my classmates and swearing, mostly to myself, more and more.

            Truth is, a couple months ago I started a post and left it until it became outdated. Yeah, I'm on top of this. I'm organized. I can regularly update a blog.
She lied, quite badly.
So. I could apologize, but let's face it. I don't have anyone to apologize to. I don't exactly have a following. Nobody's waiting patiently or not-so-patiently for my next post. I can pretty much do whatever the hell I want.
Unless my dad or something decides to check in. Then I'd just... never hear the end of it, probably.
It can be a really uncomfortable situation, when you're family all looks at your stuff. If you're me, who's self-conscious as fuck, you sort of... censor yourself. Hold back. Be a little more edited. I'm kinda slowly dropping that now, as an experiment. And by dropping that I mean typing like I'm currently thinking it, which is with a couple bad words in it because I'm actually okay with it now.
Woo. I'm a rebel. (Waves fist unenthusiastically.)
            Okay see, what I did there was imply that I'm secretly very out there and edgy and--no. No, I'm a dork. I don't have a fucking clue what anyone wants from me and quite frankly most of the time I just don't care. I might as well not care here. It would save me a lot of trouble, being liked or known on the internet shouldn't even make my list of priorities at age fifteen. That's just stupid.
            Slight change of subject. I've actually had people at school call me rude. People who have continued to sort of irk me since the start and I'm gradually starting to lose my ability to keep up a facade of civility and am actually starting to show that I don't like these people. So I'm rude now. I'm okay with that. I'm not instantly rude to people, at least I don't try to be. But my previous habit of silently harboring a dislike of someone that eventually gets exaggerated into a passive-aggressive (not even aggressive, really.) hate just isn't healthy. Seriously, I might as well make it known that they do irritating stuff like look over my shoulder when I'm drawing or just plain bug me. That's the big thing-Don't fucking look at my stuff while I'm drawing it's not for you, you twat. I will jump, and I will snap at you like a feral cat. It's not funny, it's really intrusive. And it's not about how good I am, because I've had people try to reassure me of that. NO. That is my private journal and don't proceed to pull a twenty questions on me about what I do with it it's none of your goddamn business. Also don't touch it. And don't question why I literally carry it everywhere, because it has a lot to do with people who are just generally asshats. That kind of stuff will just make a small part of me instinctively go 'this person is not worth knowing and should be avoided.' I can't help it, it's just a learned habit.
Is being an antisocial bitch who's quick to judge a learned habit?
'Cause I've concluded that's what I am.
            Part of me want's to be perceived as nice, but I'm just sick of people. I have actually given up at going out of my way to make friends in high school. If I meet someone who's nice and I like them, fine. But I'm not going to surround myself with people for the simple sake of not being alone. That's what's really weird; if you don't have friends in school they think there's something wrong with you, you're unhappy or something. In middle school, I went to the counselor's every other lunch or something and I looked forward to it. She introduced me to two people that she thought 'were a lot like me.'
They were nice... and eventually after talking to them for weeks, I realized...
They were fucking idiots.
We had literally nothing in common.
Letting people pick my friends is the biggest mistake 13-year-old me could make.
Have I reached my moody-teen phase yet? (she asked the sky sarcastically.) I'm going to end this here, because I'm just going to get more an more negative. Goodbye.

T.Y.G.E.R.

A Rant About Our Library

            So Yahoo is working again, but it really doesn't make a difference because no one e-mails me, so I freaked out for nothing. But I might actually use it one day! One day...
Yesterday I was rudely reminded that our public library is painfully limited and if you want anything specific you're flat out of luck. If they don't not have it, they probably have one freaking copy that you have to return as soon as someone else wants it, finished or not.
(Coughonwritingcough.)
I might as well just buy the god forsaken thing and keep it to thumb through as I please, but Mom is like 'No, that is bull crap' with... good reason... kind of because it wasn't that long and I normally go through books faster than thinking. Unfortunately the point of this was to absorb advice which is a bit harder than absorbing plot. Plus this thing. So I didn't exactly sit down and slog through in one big binge. And the lady, who was generally nice even though she had to tell me I couldn't keep it and that made me kind of irritated, said I could 'look to see if there's an another copy and check out that'.
Wouldn't that be redundant?
If there was a second copy, then it wouldn't be on hold now, would it? I checked. I was right.
But certainly if I was looking up something with the title 'Ten Reasons Why Jesus Loves You' or something like that, I would be up to my ears in content. That is just the kind of town we live in. So there's my rant about that. Goodbye,

T.Y.G.E.R.

Warning: Lots of Whining and Excessive Use of Caps Lock

            Yeah, so I broke the streak. I was watching Inception with my dad okay?! I can't do this, writing stuff every day is HARD. But it lasted for twenty-three posts. That's much longer than I expected! Let's try for every other day, just so I have time to let myself not worry about this thing. I started this for fun and I want to keep it fun, and lately things have just seemed to get crappier and crappier. 
And no one wants that.
On another note, I AM SO ANGRY I THINK I MIGHT CRY.
You know how I said my pen stopped working unless pressure sensitivity tests were on?
NOW IT DOESN'T EVEN DO THAT!
I replaced a pen tip. I put in a new battery. IT HATES ME NOW AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!
It's a beautiful display of karma, or perhaps irony, that this would happen RIGHT after I whine about not having Photoshop, and my dad and I have this talk about working with what you have and he wants to see me drawing on it more before he starts feeding my 'give the mouse a cookie' nature and come back all 'Yeah! I'm going to do that thing!' All motivated and happy. And it doesn't work. As far as I know, it's not the Tablet. The tablet acknowledges that it is coming in contact with the pen. 
Admittedly, my first thought was 'ROSIE!' because she nudged it earlier and I was worried because the pen, sadly, is delicate and the whole big sticker saying LEAVE PEN TIP UNTOUCHED WHEN NOT IN USE that I left on there. But it's been knocked around quite a bit, and it makes a cruel sort of sense that they would make the pen that comes with it to break so you have to buy a new one. A replacement is only ten dollars or something BUT THAT'S A DODGY TRICK AND I DON'T LIKE IT.
(...dodgy...?) Nevermind.
Now I am afraid to ask if I can buy a new pen with my birthday money because I JUST AGREED TO A LECTURE ABOUT DEALING WITH WHAT YOU GOT! And now I've got a... yep, still not working pen and I tablet I WANT to use. UNIVERSE WHY TODAY?! WHY WITH THIS!? 
I genuinely hate everything right now.
And I feel bad for being mean to Rosie.
She takes that stuff way too hard.

T.Y.G.E.R.

So Yahoo Hates Me...

            I'm too tired to think today. I got zero sleep and I just want to to lay in bed for the whole dang day, but dragged myself out of it just because the fact that I still have to do this was bugging me. I also have a slight headache.
So now that I've brought my grumpy to my blog, I am going to try and think of something else to do besides wonder why my brain thought it should wake itself up at four in the morning and refuse to go back to sleep.
.....
...........................
Nah, I'm just putting 40% of my effort into not face-planting into the keyboard.
WAKE UP ME!
Alright I'm a bit more awake.
I can no longer sign in to Yahoo. They have made it impossible. Do they realize that I DON'T FLIPPING KNOW THE ANSWER TO MY SECURITY QUESTIONS TWO YEARS LATER! And apparently they no longer recognize this device...
And they want to buy Tumblr?
They can't even make their own dang stuff decent. To this day, there is nothing but my name on my 'Yahoo profile,' and I don't know how to change that. I still get my horoscope...
It says to check my email.
... No really, that's the thing... I have too many messages and gotta go through them because blah blah it's messing with my energy blah blah it will make your chi happy.
What a bunch of twats.
It's horrible, because that's my email for everything. The one I just automatically list. And they're acting like flipping retards. I NEED that for something! Yahoo actually has a single purpose for me and it can't even do that. Idiots.
And all this is to prevent someone from hacking into my account. They won't even let me access through Facebook, which I'm on, it's just plain logging in again. Why?! You ask before you pile crap precautions on people, or at least warn them. It's just being polite. 
Wow, you'd be surprised how fast you wake up when you have something to be angry at.
I suppose all forms of social media are stupid in their own special way. But this is just too extreme. Make your stuff less crappy, Yahoo. Or at least let me access my account.

T.Y.G.E.R.